What are you hiding?

FD and E had a short conversation today about making plans for the 4th...clearly they live in different states so they were separate plans. E said both of the people she does things with on occasion will be out of town and her sister is working. When E suggested that she might go visit her parents E's sister got upset (even though she's working). She asked E, "well what about your guy friend?" E responded, "that's not how that thing works." So E is spending another holiday (woo hoo its the 4th) alone. 

Some people equate being busy with having a social life--E is SUPER guilty of this and FD admitted she does it too. E's take on being busy is that "busyness hides loneliness" which she is prob guilty of more than many people. See, E technically works 4 jobs, coaches, volunteers, does the church thing, volunteers some more, and is in a couple of clubs and on a committee at work--its called the state of being an overachiever. E has always been kind of (okay a lot of) a loner. "Flowers on the Wall" (the song)probably is fitting at times--not that she smokes cigarettes or really talks to herself. E is what is known as an extroverted introvert or the most complicated personality type there is--GO E! Which means she constantly feels like she is "on" but is always being judged and walks on eggshells. E can only take so much of people and she needs time away to recharge--like lots of time. Being an introvert is complicated in itself because this world isn't kind to the introverts. It is set up for extroverts. E likes to be behind the scenes out of sight so that she can avoid people, emotions, and other parts of life. She stays busy but often finds that she is very lonely even amongst a crowd. Which is probably why E is single and has a hard time overcoming it.  

What's the solution? Don't know. Maybe it is just accepting one's self.  Maybe it is being forced outside the comfort zone, either way it is a challenge E faces.